space

insecure.
thinking about past tense.
focusing on future.
bridges burned.
relationships tarnished.
nothing lasts forever.
speaking the truth upon death ears.
eye cry in my plight to be.
traveling far and wide to search for my father deceased.
memories of his speech travels through my mental journey of escape as i draw on the strength of pain felt.
wanting inner peace from turmoil of life.
too heavy to speak.
personable, friendly, polite.
shy and timid.
i am.
loud, humor to cover it all.
striving for difference.
it doesn't work.
it seems someone always had something to say.
thinking about holding him at night.
telling him I love him and never take him for granted.
the feeling of him inside of me...only a vivid thought...
tear drops.
bridges burned.
love lost.
time moves on.
never happy.
never satisfied.
expectations not met, why have them?
like prince said, 'when doves cry.'
the curse of my mother,
the indulgent sins of my father.
somewhere in between all of that.
my life exists.